By April O’Neil
When you think about top stars in the Near Hentai Studios, you have to talk about Ash Ketchum. His body of work is long and varied, and his appearances have always been widely popular. In spite of this, many might consider him an underappreciated talent, often managing to avoid the spotlight that other stars of his calibre often enjoy. We’ll be aiming to rectify that a bit today, as I sit down with the would-be Pokémon Master to ask him questions submitted by you, his fans.
Ash was all smiles as he greeted me in the interview room, positively beaming with excitement for the interview. After some niceties, we quickly began.
APRIL: “So, Ash. As you know, we’ve collected a handful of questions submitted to us through the Near Hentai Twitter account. These questions are all specifically for you. Are you ready?”
ASH: “Yeah! I’ve been thinking about it all day! What do my fans want to know?”
APRIL: “Well, let’s start off with a question I think many people have wondered. What is your favorite Pokémon? The person who submitted this question with an, ‘If you know what I mean.’ So…”
ASH: “So they want to know what Pokémon is my favorite to get fucked by?”
APRIL: “That’s how I read it, yes.”
ASH: “I don’t think anyone will be surprised by my answer, but it’s Pikachu. Specifically my Pikachu, I mean. Sex with Pokémon isn’t that different than sex with humans, you know. What matters more than dick size or body type or whatever is the relationship you’ve formed. So, like, gettin’ dicked down by a random Charizard might be more fun than if, um, Ritchie’s Pikachu Sparky fucked me. But because Pikachu and I have formed such a strong bond over our adventures, gettin’ fucked by him is… special.”
APRIL: “That’s a surprisingly sweet answer, Ash. Speaking of Ritchie, someone also asked if you two are in a relationship. They even mentioned wanting to see more of you two together, and called you a gorgeous couple.”
ASH: “Haha, gorgeous, huh? I never thought anyone’d call me that. Um, I don’t think I could say Ritchie and I are an item or anything. I don’t have anyone I’m in a committed relationship with. I’ve traveled with so many different partners, and we’ve all had flings on the road and such, but… Ritchie’s one of many people I’ve met on my travels who’s very important to me. But I can’t call him my boyfriend. That being said, I definitely enjoy being with him, and it’d be great to do more scenes together for the Studio.”
APRIL: “You mentioned having multiple partners, but have you ever slept with Ahsoka Tano before?”
ASH: “Nope, don’t think so. Who is that?”
APRIL: “She’s an orange gal, white marks on her face. She’s got this big blue and white shape instead of hair. If you’ve seen her, you wouldn’t forget.”
ASH: “Ohh! Yeah, yeah, I remember her. She won the NHML raffle a while back, right?”
APRIL: “Almost exactly a year ago, yes, in December of 2019.”
ASH: “Right, okay. Sorry, I don’t know the name of every person who comes into the Studio. But to answer the question, no, I haven’t had the pleasure. She is kinda interesting though, isn’t she? Almost like a half-human half-Pokémon.”
APRIL: “I believe she’s from an alien planet.”
ASH: “Mm, that makes sense. Alien girls are fun.”
APRIL: “So we asked you about your favorite Pokémon, so now I’d like to ask you who your favorite male human partner from your journeys is.”
ASH: “Oh, there’s been so many, haha… I always say Brock to that question, though. It’s honestly more complicated than that, but Brock was my first and still the best. I’ve had a lot of fun with guys like Ritchie, Max, Clemont and many others, but Brock’s the only one to fuck me just right, y’know?”
APRIL: “I see, the sentimental type, huh?”
ASH: “Heheh, I guess you could say that!”
APRIL: “And could you tell us about your first time with Clemont?”
ASH: “Gosh, what’s to tell? When we traveled together, the normal sleeping arrangements would be for Bonnie and Serena to share a tent, or a bed if we were lucky enough to have those, and Clemont and I would do the same. You get two boys sleeping close together night after night, week after week… Eventually someone’s gonna catch someone jerkin’ off. Um, in Clemont’s case he cracked first.
“We were back-to-back in a tent, I remember. Not sure where it was, maybe outside Lumiose City? I’m fuzzy on that. Anyway, I could hear him trying to quietly jerk one out, so I scooted closer until our backs were touching. That’s a move I picked up from Ritchie, by the way, he tried the same thing on me when we were stranded just the two of us. So he froze, of course, but after a moment decided to keep going. I guess he thought I’d just scooted closer in my sleep, but then I rolled over and draped my arm over him. He stifled a little scream, and I whispered in his ear something about helping him out. He didn’t say anything when I grabbed his cock, so I jerked him off for a while… Eventually I got him to lie back and let me suck him off. After he came he offered to return the favor. It was probably only a few days later when we fucked for the first time, but by then it was just a matter of asking.”
APRIL: “I see, thank you for that lovely story. So, what was it like being between Goku and Vegeta?”
ASH: “Oh, intense. Those guys are so powerful you can’t wrap your head around it. In the scene you’re taking about, I’d throw my ass back onto Goku’s dick, and it’d hit him… Um, it was like hitting a wall or something. There was no give, he didn’t rock back or anything. Then he’d thrust forward and… I don’t know, I’ve been fucked by some big, strong Pokémon in the past, but nothing as intimidating as those two. If they hadn’t been so gentle with me I probably could’ve died.”
APRIL: “Would you do it again?”
ASH: “With both at once? I don’t know… It was a wild, fun ride at the time, but part of that was how fast my heart was racing. I probably would, but it’d take some courage. As for going with them separately, I’ve already done some more work with Goku. There’s something thrilling about being with a guy who can lift you like you’re weightless. I probably would with Vegeta, too, if asked, but I don’t know how he’d feel about it. He was very quiet and gruff when I met him, and he hasn’t talked to me since.”
APRIL: “The last part of this question is, what do you think of Goku and Vegeta?”
ASH: “Well, Goku’s pretty cool. He’s very laid back and funny, and easy to talk to. I kinda wish he was my dad, if I’m being honest. Vegeta’s… harder to peg. Like I said, he was so quiet when we met, I don’t feel like I know him very well.”
APRIL: “I see. Now then, would you be interested in being part of the Trap Sluts series?”
ASH: “Oh, for sure, Near and I have talked about that. We still have the Ashley wig I wore for my shoot with mom and Professor Oak, and we’ve talked about doing a slutty take on that look. The only real problem is that we don’t do new TS shoots every day, y’know, and getting in for one can be tricky. I’m definitely game for it eventually, though, if I get the chance.”
APRIL: “Our next one is a bit existential, but what are your thoughts on your own eternal youth? Does the unending abyss of eternity frighten you, or do you look forward to having as much sex as you could possibly want until the heat death of the universe?”
ASH: “Is that really one of the questions?”
APRIL: “Nearly word for word, yes.”
ASH: “Okay, so… Well, if they’re asking about my life in the show, then it’s not something you notice. You can talk to Bart or Timmy or any number of other kids whose shows go on for ages, and they’ll tell you the same thing. In the show, you don’t realize how much time is passing. It’s almost like your life resets every year or so. If they’re asking about living here in the Studio, then that’s a different issue. None of us here age, but Near does. Presumably he’s going to die eventually, and with him so will our whole little community in the Studio. This version of me will die then, even if I don’t age a day in that time.”
APRIL: “Damn, I hadn’t thought about that…”
ASH: “Me neither, but Gohan and Izuku were talking about it the other day and it kinda stuck with me. So, um… yeah, we’re not really immortal, even if it seems like it. Though the version of me still catching Pokémon might go on forever, I guess, since his life is tied to companies and licenses and stuff I don’t really understand. Like I did when I was him, though, he’ll never understand that.”
APRIL: “Our last two are a bit silly, I think, but hopefully you’ll have fun answering them. First, how many Pokéballs, or equally-sized balls, can you fit in your ass?”
ASH: “That’s gotta be when they’re small and pocket-sized, right? I don’t think I could fit even one full-sized ball up there, though I’m not in any hurry to try… When they’re small, I guess maybe three or four? I haven’t pushed my limits before, but four’s I think how many I ended up inserting before deciding to stop the last time I did that.”
APRIL: “And secondly, due to popular belief and many jokes over the years, would you ever put ketchup in your ass?”
ASH: “What? Oh… because of my last name?”
APRIL: “Presumably.”
ASH: “Like, for a joke or something? I guess, maybe? I don’t imagine it’d feel particularly pleasant, and I’d want a shower right after. If I knew anyone who was obsessed with ketchup I could see using it as a way to start a rimjob, but… Gosh, when I think of the taste of ketchup and ass together, I’m not sure who’ I’d reel in with that. I guess, yeah… I guess I’d only do it for the joke, but I don’t think it’s a very funny joke.”
APRIL: “Well, thank you for taking the time to answer all these questions, Ash.”
ASH: “No prob, Miss O’Neil! It’s always fun seeing what the people who jerk off to you are thinking about.”
We parted ways soon after, naturally, with him telling me how excited he was to watch the interview back with his friends. He was in high spirits as I watched him go. This has been April O’Neil, and if you enjoyed this interview and would like to participate in the next, please keep an eye on the Near Hentai official Twitter page for your chance to submit questions for our next interviewee. I’ll see you all in the next NHS Spotlight!